"Although there are many ways we can provoke our kids in discipling them, we learn from Paul's expositions of grace in these epistles that we provoke and discourage our children when we forget the gospel and demand, as a condition of our approval and affection, that they obey the law that 'neither our fathers nor we have been able to bear' (Acts 15:10). By itself, God's law, although it is 'holy and righteous and good' (Rom. 7:12), will serve only to aggravate or discourage them. The law will stir up within them the desire to sin because they are not able to obey it. It won't furnish them with the power or motivation to obey us or the Lord. The law has its uses with our children, but making them good isn't one of them. Only the gospel and God's grace can change hearts."
~ Quoted from Counsel from the Cross: Connecting Broken People to the Love of Christ, by Elyse M. Fitzpatrick and Dennis E. Johnson.