"Do you think many of our older Christian sisters in Christ would reply? Or are the majority too busy enjoying their lives now that they have time to themselves?"
The answers she got were both thoughtful and gracious: maybe older women are afraid or feel inadequate. Maybe they don't know you well enough. I'd like to add another "maybe" to the pot--maybe they haven't been trained up themselves.
The women who are now a generation ahead of me were becoming adults in the 60's and 70's--the time of feminism, hippies, women's lib, free love, the pill, no-fault divorce, and Roe v. Wade. They were bombarded with the ideas of Gloria Steinham and Betty Friedan who set out to liberate women from the exact things Titus 2 says they needed to learn. (For more information on feminism's Marxist roots, you can wade through the articles at Ladies Against Feminism or read So Much More.) And sadly enough, these ideas have not been barred from the church. Let's face it, a preacher takes his life (or at least his day job) into his hands these days preaching from texts like Titus 2:3-5, 1 Timothy 2:9-15, 5:3-16, or 1 Corinthians 14:34-36! Maybe a lot of older Christian women simply don't know much about what they're supposed to be teaching.
This leads me to my second, and much more personal thought: If these ladies do exist and came out of the woodwork of our churches, would we be willing to listen to them?
I am a child of the 70's. My mother's generation has empowered me. I can be all that I can be, even in the army! I've grown up understanding that children can be killed before birth and old people are burdens. I've been taught to follow my feelings and that everything is relative to how I think about it. I can have it my way, right away. I deserve a break today. I'm worth it! And I believe the Scripture calls me a stiffnecked fool.
With teaching and training comes breaking. (Ask those folks in the army.) I don't want "yes mams" for coaches, but women who will teach me God's Word even if it hurts. But my own ideas of how things should run have to be laid down in order to ascribe to something else. And I find this dying to self thing very difficult.
3 comments:
Thought provoking. I think I've been especially blessed to have older women in my life. A professor in college, my own mother, several ladies in my church...We didn't seek eachother out intentionally, the relationships just happened. Oftentimes they would invite me into their Bible Studies or homes and it went from there.
I want to be a Titus 2 woman to those younger and have been able to do that only with the help of my husband. It takes time away from the family and a regular evening most weeks. Really, if it weren't for him, I don't think it would happen. I met with a young lady (acquaintance) Andrea as she went through nursing school, engagement and first year of marriage. Now she's a mom of two and we see eachother every other week. I've just started meeting with a college student from our church (our favorite babysitter) who is in nursing school and we are reading through a book together.
I think that I often get more out of these relationships then they do. It keeps me accountable in challenging ways to live what I "preach".
My husband, on the other hand, has struggled for years (until we came to our current church) to find older men to disciple him. He's asked outright several times and been turned down. He was very discouraged for some time.
Sorry about the long response, but you just got me thinking.
Oh, and now I'm challenged as my girls are growing to what does Titus 2 mean for our relationship. I don't want to be neglecting that role in their live either.
I'm so thankful for God's strength and most of all His Word or this would all be impossible.
I thought about commenting on Beth's blog about our parents having gone through the feminist movement & what that meant for how we were raised, but I wasn't sure I would've been able to get my point across as clearly as you did. I am a child of the 70s as well. I come from a "long line of strong independent women". It can take years to undo that strong-I-can-do-anything kind of mentality. ASK ME HOW I KNOW.
I think listening to anyone telling me that I am doing something "wrong" wouldn't be exactly embraced. If there was a women whose own life inspired me, I would definitely be willing to lay myself aside & try something new. It reminds me of the devotional I read today on Proverbs31 Ministries website.
Darling Saralyn, nice post! This one is a near and dear conversation between us, and I must say I wish I had a cup of joe right now for one of our wonderful chats!
Having met many older women, I confess to both situations. One lady I recently met, said something to me, that was a gentle admonishment, and it "bristled me" something fierce, till I prayed about it. But lovely older and wiser ladies, I have found unfortunately very rare indeed.
Most of them, have stronger ties to feminist and marxist thinking than even I do. The ideas they have of submission are, well not to be to harsh, but often ridiculously shy of my understandings.
example?
"I submit to my husband, and he said to do 'whatever I wanted', as he watched tv, or read the paper.."
In such cases I have come across, I find often times, it's a technicality, yeah I got that base covered... Not a heart stopping, sit down with me dear, hear my heart, know me, and tell me when I am rushing fool hearty into the next thing, admonish me when I am wound up as tight as a bungy cord. The submission, is well, worldly. It misses the mark. It misses the heart.
Titus 2, is life changing, mind altering, death to self, not a honey, you don't mind if.... fill in the blank.
I agree Saralyn, when they do show up it can be hard to hear, really hard, but more often than not, those who may qualify for age reasons, simply aren't qualified.
They are as ill equipped perhaps more so, than you or I.
I say lets come along side and love them, and pray for them, and be as gracious to them, as we have had ladies be gracious to us... I would ramble more but my husband has arrived, and I need to submit to his wishes. :) Dinner is ON!
you are loved,
great post!
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